June 10, 2006

pop culture roundup vol 1

dear ingmar,

let me entertain you, let me make you smile.

it's saturday and why not indulge in a little pop culture news?

tom everett scott will be starring in the new tnt drama "saved" where he plays a troubled bad boy paramedic. though this is supposedly "an acclaimed new series" set to potentially rival the network's other front runner "the closer" we all know that scottie boy will never outshine the brilliance that was his performance in an american werewolf in paris. what, you've never seen that movie? don't you follow cult horror? you, of all people?!

the omen made a devilish killing at the box office when it debuted this tuesday, but as a loyal fan of the original omen, i instead spent my movie-going experience compiling a list of hollywood starlets i'd like to see meet the same fate that befell julia stiles' character in this scene.

also, do you think julia stiles resembles a skinny blond version of rosie o'donnell? seriously, follow the visual logic below:



i will spare you the coming of christ brangelina messiah-baby story since i'm sure you can find it featured in every single media release known to man (and aliens from at least 3 galaxies away). what we are not told is that shiloh nouvel also possesses the ultimate power to eventually overthrow the u.s. oligarchy, as she not only has the two secret weapons needed to win public adoration (angelina's lips and brad's nose) but like any prophetic usurper, she is also not of woman born.

anderson cooper can deny/avoid the question of his homosexuality all he wants but one glimsp into his ipod playlist reveals what we all knew from the beginning. the only reason i care about anderson cooper is because i read his latest book (which was decent) and all kidding aside, i actually like him as the bearer of my news...that i only sort of care about. plus, the whole tragedy with his family (his brother committed suicide) is interesting because you know i'm only interested in people who come from a messed up past. everyone else is just a waste of time.

well that'll do it for now. some other stuff happened but they're not important. just like the world cup.

so i'll leave you now to agda who has no doubtly already prepared the nightly sponge bath.

-- j

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